Longing

I appreciate the guest post, Marian Combs
All I can do this afternoon is long for the peace and quiet that comes when all the work is done and the kids are in bed. The house takes on a whole new feel as I make my rounds, flipping off the lamps and double checking the locks on the doors. I can actually breathe for the first time today a sigh of relief.

I want to watchdirect tv saint petersburg from the comfort of my bed with the covers pulled tight around me. It has been an extremely long day and nothing will bring me more satisfaction than bringing it to a close with one of my favorite shows on my DVR. How did I ever live without this little device?

Technology certainly makes me wonder that very question often. My cell phone alone is a work of art filled with everything that makes my days go smoothly so that I can lie down at night and relax. With all the excitement of the day, I know sleep will find me easily tonight, right after a little Travel Channel.

Balancing the writer within you against being a mom and wife.

Balancing the writer within you against being a mom and wife.

I am Super Mom!

Endowed with special powers and abilities, beyond those of mortal women, I can get the munchkin off to gymnastics, cheerleading, Girl Scouts, and swim lessons.  I can put hot food on the table for dinner while assisting with homework, baths, and bedtime... And, I still find time to keep the hubby happy (nudge nudge wink wink). I can do all of this and still have time to write my novels.

Sorry… I can't even write that with a straight face.

Lies all lies.

Here’s the reality. I’m a sleep-deprived, overworked, mom who just doesn’t know the meaning of the word balance. I wish I were super mom.  I wish I were super author. I try so hard to do it all, and at the end of the day I fall face forward into the couch.

Yes, you read that right, I tend to sleep on the couch. It’s a point of frustration for my hubby and a thing of comedy for my daughter. There are many mornings where I wake up to the sound of my 7 year old daughter yelling, “Mom slept on the couch again!!!”

Because being supermom (or trying to) means a lot of time devoted to family, writing is often done when said family is peacefully snoozing away. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve fallen asleep with my laptop, on the couch. It just happens. Then, bright and early at 7am either my hubby (on his way to work) or my daughter (getting ready for school) wakes me up.

Writing is my passion. It’s a part of me. More than just a hobby, it’s a compulsion. I have to do it. If I don’t do at least one writing related thing each day I get cranky. But to be able to write, I need a certain type of quiet.  Hence the dilemma.

For my family’s sake, it gives the illusion of balance. While the family is home, they have 100% of my attention. I’m there ready and willing to take care of the things they need.  Daytime is family time. Then, once I have tucked them into bed my real work begins.  And, as many of you writers know, once you have the muse working, it can mean hours upon hours of writing time. Which is why I said that “balance” is illusion. Sometimes those bouts of inspiration and writing turn into an all-nighters. That leaves me so spent that if I don’t end up sleeping on the couch, I end up crashing shortly after I drop my daughter off at school.

We all have to sleep sometime.

Not every night goes this way, but many of them do while I’m feverously working on a project.  So far, I’ve been able to write and publish 5 titles in the last few years. I write a mix of Urban Fantasy and Paranormal Romance.  Surprise, surprise, all of my titles involve vampires. There must be some connection there between writing about those creatures of the night and the time of day I use for writing.

If you’re interested in checking out my special brand of vampires, feel free to stop by my website http:///www.katiesalidas.com

Or you can search for me on any of your favorite ebook retailer’s website.
Amazon.com
Amazon UK
Barnes & Noble
Smashwords

Novels in the Immortalis Series

Immortalis Carpe Noctem
Hunters & Prey (Immortalis #2)
Pandora’s Box (Immortalis #3)

Guest post from Family on Bikes

There are few topics more likely to arouse passion in parents than the education of their children. Parents throughout the world want the exact same things for their offspring. We all want them to be healthy, happy, and successful - although our definition of those things may vary. We expect our children’s education to provide what they will need to achieve those goals – even though we approach that education in millions of different ways.

I think we can all agree there is no one right way to educate a child. Each child and each parent is a unique human being with our own strengths and weaknesses and interests and needs. We bring all of that to the table when we plan an educational program – each program is a one-of-a-kind program, even if that program happens in public school. Or on the road.

My husband and I opted to provide a very different kind of educational program for our twin sons – a radically out-of-the-box program. Our sons spent four years riding bicycles 27,000 miles throughout North, Central, and South America. Yep – it was THAT out of the box!

My husband and I – both long-time school teachers – made the decision to take our sons out of school in order to travel our country on two wheels. We spent the boys’ third grade year cycling through nineteen US states and five Mexican states. We took advantage of our experiences to help our sons learn about their world.

By the time we returned home a year later, all four of us knew we weren’t done exploring the world on bikes. After the boys finished Grade 4, we hopped on bikes again – this time to ride from Alaska to Argentina. It took us three years to ride 17,300 miles through fifteen countries – it was three years of magic. And learning.

The beauty of roadschooling is that learning is built into our lives so naturally. As we travel through various countries, we are constantly exposed to new traditions, foods, and cultures. Learning about those cultures comes naturally – it’s not about doing research reports on Wikipedia.

It’s about eating lomo saltado in a roadside restaurant in Peru and drinking mate through a straw from a gourd in Argentina. It’s about spraying foam at passers-by during Carnival or hiking to a religious artifact for a pilgrimage in Ecuador. It’s attending classes with school kids in Honduras and Peru and scuba diving with turtles in the Galapagos Islands.

While roadschooling, we naturally learned about the Olmecan, Mayan, and Incan peoples – and our sons naturally learned to compare and contrast the various ruins. They learned the differences between llamas, alpacas, guanaco, and vicuña when they cycled past them. They can tell you with certainty that the Andean Mountains are very different from the Rockies – they’ve pedaled up and over both chains.

For our family, roadschooling was a great option. Is it the only or the best way to educate a child? Heck no! But it worked wonders for us – and is easier than many may think. (But that’s another blog post…)

--

Family of four cycled 17,300 miles through 15 countries from Alaska to Argentina!
 www.familyonbikes.com

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Because Babies Grow Up: The Truth About Toddlers

By Dave Buchwald (Own work)
[CC-BY-SA-3.0 or GFDL],
via Wikimedia Commons

Having a toddler around can be very trying on your patience, creativity and ingenuity. There is so much going on in that little body that it often gets the best of them and us as we try to work through our daily routine. Here are three things to keep in mind that will help you keep your sanity.

Toddlers love repetition.

Repetition is a great learning tool for adults and toddlers. The difference is that adults get bored with repetition long before toddlers do.

I watched my friend’s little boy just a few days before he turned two. For the couple hours he was at my house we had the same conversation a few dozen times. It went something along these lines,

Boy: “Where’s my daddy?”

Me: “At work.”

Boy: “Light?”

Me: “Yes, that’s a light.”

Boy: “Where’s my mommy?”

Me: “Studying.”

Boy: “She go the van?”

Me: “Yes, she left in the van.”

And repeat.

At first I thought I wasn’t understanding him. Then I thought he didn’t understand me. Then I realized it was a game for him. He wanted to interact with me but his abilities are still limited so he engaged me the best he could. This exchange built his confidence with the language and his turn taking skills which are both an important part of communicating.

Toddlers hate sharing.

From birth babies love faces. They are wired for human interaction. They smile and coo and win us over. Then they start reaching for things, like our mouths and hair and we think their interaction is just so cute.

Then they discover the independence of walking. They wander off and play by themselves. They are almost hostile anytime another kid comes over to play. It’s hard to see our sweet, interactive babies turn into individualistic toddlers. But that’s part of their development.

It’s important for toddlers to learn to play by themselves. They need the security of knowing mom or someone is close by and the freedom of having full control of their play experience. This is crucial for their ability to learn to play with other children. While we want to encourage sharing and playing nice, we also need to recognize their stage and accept that they need this time to learn to play alone.

Toddlers have intense emotional experiences.

With all this learning, discovery and freedom comes a whole new depth of emotional reactions to their experiences. So much learning and growth takes place in such a short amount of time that they are easily overextended and react with meltdowns.

When the meltdown comes we need to really hear what’s at the root of the emotion and help our toddler to know we’ve heard it and that we care. What is silly and insignificant to us, through our long-term perspective, is devastating and life-altering to our little ones.

I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve sat on the grocery store floor with my child lamenting with her that we weren’t going to buy the toy or candy or whatever that day. Just as toddlers had to learn to control their muscles in order to crawl and walk, they need to learn to control their emotions so they can communicate and function.

Armed with these three truths about toddlers, you are ready to enjoy your little one in all the happy and not-so-happy moments.

About the Author: Amber blogs at Because Babies Grow Up about child development, parenting, and life with three little ones.

Guest Post from Meg Mitchell Moore

In my debut novel, The Arrivals, three adult siblings return to their parents’ home in Burlington, Vt., over the course of a summer, bringing their grownup problems with them. Their reasons for being home are myriad: a teetering marriage, financial ruin, a pregnancy emergency. To be sure, putting three siblings in one house at the same time shows the extreme end of adult children leaning on their parents, but fiction wouldn’t be very interesting without extremes.

So how common are similar scenarios? Common enough that it doesn’t take long to find blog after blog dedicated to the topic (here’s one: www.adultchildrenlivingathome.com/blog/category/statistics). On Amazon, a search on the subject yielded dozens and dozens of results: The Nesting Syndrome, Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children, How to Really Love Your Adult Child, and so on. Because I first ran the search without specifying only books, one result that popped up was a rollaway bed on wheels, which I found both comical and telling.

You can find statistics about adult children returning home by state and by country. You can find individual stories or wide-ranging data. According to a recent survey by the Pew Research Center, 13 percent of parents with grown children say one of their adult sons or daughters has moved back home in the past year. In the United States, also according to the Pew Research Center, 2.9 million children, or four percent of all children, are being raised mainly by at least one grandparent; this number increased dramatically during the country’s latest economic recession. Grandparents, AARP tells us in a different survey, are making increasingly frequent appearances on volunteer days in schools.

The Owen siblings who populate my book are all between the ages of twenty-nine and thirty-six. They should all be self-sufficient, both economically and emotionally, but in these times of heartbreak or economic difficulty they have found their way back home, where they alternately annoy and delight their parents and each other with their presence. Early readers of my book have had harsh words for the oldest sibling, Lillian, who brings her three-year-old daughter and infant boy home for a good portion of the summer, trailing baby socks and breast pump equipment. She is, the way many mothers are, so focused on her baby and her nursing schedule that it is difficult for her to see what others are going through. (I’ve been there, and I bet many readers of this blog have too!) I have been told variously that Lillian needs a kick in the pants, to have her neck wrung, to be told what’s what. I have been told that Ginny and William Owen should not have put up with some of the behavior they accept from their adult children. A very discerning reader has pointed out that the book shows how, when adult siblings return home, they often revert to their original roles in the family.

I know this is a website for moms, so how about it, moms? Do you depend on your parents more than your parents depended on their parents? When your children are all grown up is it going to be adios or call whenever you need anything?

5 Tips for Spending Less

Guest Post By Heidi Grant Halvorson, Ph.D.,

Author of Succeed: How We Can Reach Our Goals

Everyone knows that if you want to get your finances in order and start being smart about your financial future, you need to make a financial plan. And there is lots of terrific advice out there from personal finance experts on what should go into that plan. But knowing how to stick to your plan, whatever it might be, is the really critical part of the puzzle, and it's the part we pay the least attention to. Understanding how to stick to a plan once you've made it isn't a financial issue, it's a motivational one. Luckily, there are very effective strategies you can use to make sure you follow through on your good financial intentions.

Tip #1: Be very specific about what you want to achieve. "Saving money each month" sounds like a good step, but how much money? "Pay off credit card debt" is a great idea, but how quickly? How much will you pay, and on which cards? When the steps in our plans are vague, like "spend less here" or "save more there," there is way too much wiggle room. We find ourselves settling for very small changes in the right direction, when actually, people are much more motivated when working toward challenging goals. Be specific, and set the bar high.

Tip #2: You need to make sure that your plan includes concrete actions you are going to take in order to reach your financial goals. Turn "spend less money eating out" into "I'll bring lunch with me to work each day, and eat out no more than once a week." One of the most common reasons we fail to reach our goals and stick to our plans is that we don't translate what we want to accomplish into real, everyday behavior. "Cut down on my clothing expenses" needs to become "spend no more than $____ on clothes each month," or you'll never succeed in making real change.

Tips #3-5: Most of us are guilty of buying things we don't really need. If your finances are in a sorry state, you will definitely need to get a handle on your impulse buying, and fast. Out-of-control spending is just another example of succumbing to temptation - -  for some of us it's doughnuts or chocolates, for others it's gadgets and designer shoes. Tips #3-5 are simple strategies you can use to help you resist the temptation to spend.

    Tip #3: Never, ever shop as a pick-me-up. When you are tired, anxious, stressed, or depressed, your self-control will be at its weakest. This is a perfect recipe for a bad decision.

    Tip #4: When you are faced with the temptation to splurge, it can help if you stop and think about someone you know who has lots of self-control - -  someone who is financially responsible. Self-control is actually contagious, and studies show that just thinking about someone who has it can boost your own.

    Tip #5: Finally, reward yourself for good behavior. Everyone needs incentives. When you have a fiscally responsible week, or month, treat yourself to something you want that won't totally blow your budget. For some of us, there just isn't enough inherent satisfaction in being frugal to keep you motivated, so reward yourself with something that speaks to you.

© 2010 Heidi Grant Halvorson, Ph.D., author of Succeed: How We Can Reach Our Goals

Author Bio

Heidi Grant Halvorson, author of Succeed: How We Can Reach Our Goals, is a social psychologist, educational consultant, and most recently assistant professor of psychology at Lehigh University. She has received several grants from the National Science Foundation. In addition to her work as author and co-editor of the highly-regarded academic book The Psychology of Goals (Guilford, 2009), she has authored papers in her field's most prestigious journals.

Dr. Grant Halvorson is a member of the American Psychological Association, the Association for Psychological Science, and the Society for Personality and Social Psychology, and was recently elected to the highly selective Society for Experimental Social Psychology. She received her PhD from Columbia University working with Carol Dweck (author of Mindset: The New Psychology of Success), and her BA in Psychology from the University of Pennsylvania.
For more information please visit http://heidigranthalvorson.com/ and follow the author on Facebook and Twitter

A Clean, Nontoxic Space

Guest Post By Erika Landau, M.D., and Abigail Brenner, M.D.,Authors of The Essential Guide to Baby's First Year

    When it comes to babies, keeping toxins out of the air in your home as much as possible is important. Chemicals used for general household cleaning can do a terrific job removing grease and grime, but they can be particularly dangerous for the young, developing respiratory system of a newborn -- and to his or her skin.

   Fumes from paints and materials used in carpeting can have an impact on breathing. Of course, smoke, dust, and mold are other known culprits that can cause respiratory problems and allergic reactions.

    Window seals, screens, fans, curtains, and upholstery should be freshly cleaned before the newborn comes home, because dust and grime accumulates on them. Make sure that the air conditioner filters are changed and that the heating system is checked and ducts are cleaned if necessary. Smoke and carbon monoxide detectors are absolutely necessary to install and/or check near everyroom.

Reducing Chemicals 
    Well before your baby arrives, it's a good idea to get your home improvement projects done and to thoroughly clean your home. You will likely be painting a nursery, which ideally should be done at least a few weeks prior to the baby moving in -- using only low- or no- VOC (volatile organic components) paint. Even if the paints you use are organic, some of these fumes can still cause harm. Finishing the painting weeks ahead of time gives the room a chance to dry and the paint fumes to dissipate. It's never a good idea to allow a baby to sleep in a freshly painted room (such as painting it after the baby is home), because the fumes are very dangerous to a baby.
Pregnant women should not be exposed to toxins of any kind including paint, as well as household cleaners, especially aerosol products, insecticides, etc.

  Also, if you have other household projects such as removing and/or installing new carpeting, do it two to four weeks before the baby comes home -- especially if it is going in the nursery. This allows time for the fumes and odor to subside and the carpet to get worn in a little bit. New carpet has toxic agents sprayed on it at the factory that smell the strongest when it's brand new. It helps to have a window open and a fan on for 24-48 hours after it's installed. If possible, buy carpet made of natural fiber -- and of course, one that is non-flammable.

   When it comes to household cleaning, choose cleaning products that are environmentally safe and non-toxic. Because you are bringing home your most precious possession, you will want your home to be as clean and safe as possible.

Natural Cleaning Products
    In general, the chemical products used for cleaning are harsh; they can cause eye irritation, pulmonary problems, nausea, and allergies. In addition, they can be rather expensive. It's actually very easy to clean an entire home using only natural products that are readily available at the store and often much less expensive. Here are some "staples" of natural cleaning products that are much safer to use, especially when a newborn is living in the house:

• Vinegar: Regular white vinegar mixed with equal amounts of water will clean windows, mirrors, floors, and the bathroom.

• Baking soda: Mixed with equal amounts of vinegar, this combination will clean sinks, the bathroom, and toilets. On its own with water, it will clean hard surfaces.

• Olive oil: Olive oil (extra virgin not necessary!) works great for polishing furniture.

• Lemon: Lemons and all citrus fruits cut grease really well.

• Tea tree oil: Dilute 8-10 drops in 2 cups water for a good disinfectant.

• Borax: This product can be used to combat certain fungi, cockroaches, and fleas.

On a regular basis, try to maintain a clean, safe, and non-toxic environment by dusting regularly, opening windows for fresh air, vacuuming with a filter and changing the filter frequently. Also refrain from using room deodorizers, because they have chemical components.
Plants 
Household plants are good to have in your home because they purify the air by absorbing toxins and breaking down chemicals. Don't place them directly in the baby's room, but do place them around your home, away from where your baby will be regularly.
Be very careful of the plants you buy for your home. Some plants can be poisonous to children and pets. Good non-toxic plants include:

• African violets
• Jade plant
• Reed palm
• Boston fern
• Weeping fig
• Spider plant
• Begonia
• Zebra plant

Toxic plants to avoid in the home include:

• Dieffenbachia
• Philodendron
• Bird of paradise
• Elephant ears
• Chrysanthemums

Find a complete list of safe and unsafe plants at the American Academy of Pedial website, AAP.org.
The above is an excerpt from the book The Essential Guide to Baby's First Year by Erika Landau, M.D., and Abigail Brenner, M.D. The above excerpt is a digitally scanned reproduction of text from print. Although this excerpt has been proofread, occasional errors may appear due to the scanning process. Please refer to the finished book for accuracy.
Copyright © 2011 Erika Landau, M.D., and Abigail Brenner, M.D., authors of The Essential Guide to Baby's First Year

Author Bios
Erika Landau, M.D., co-author of The Essential Guide to Baby's First Year, is a New York pediatrician who completed her training at the Albert Einstein College of Medicine and was a research fellow at The Rockefeller University in New York. She is a fellow of teh American Academy of Pediatrics, has a private practice, is an assistant professor of pediatrics and director of teh Student Health Center at Mount Sinai School of Medicine.
Abigail Brenner, M.D., co-author of The Essential Guide to Baby's First Year, attended New York Medical college and completed her internship and residency in psychiatry at New York University Bellevue Medical Center. A board-certified psychiatrist in practice for more than 30 years, she is a Fellow of the American Psychiatric Association. She is the author of Transitions: How Women Embrace Change and Celebrate Life and SHIFT: How to Deal When Life Changes.
For more information please visit Amazon, and follow the author on Facebook and Twitter

How Extreme Couponers Can Help Tornado Victims – Donate Your Stockpile Items!

Guest post by  Rasha

While this recession makes it difficult to donate cash money, couponers have a secret weapon… that’s right, COUPONS! You can donate from your stockpile or use current coupons and sales to affordably acquire the items requested for donations. Our hearts go out to all of the victims of natural disasters. With heavy hearts full of love and concern, it’s time to take action! Whether you are an extreme couponer or a casual bargain hunter, use your money saving skills to help now.

 Commonly Requested Items for Donation:
Bottled Water
Non-perishable / Shelf Stable Food (canned food, granola bars, peanut butter, etc.)
Toiletry Items (soap, toothbrushes, toothpaste, deodorant, shampoo, toilet paper, feminine hygiene products, etc.)
Blankets
Clothing

 Where to Donate – Nationwide
Salvation Army
You can donate unopened packages of water, food, toiletry items, etc. at your local Salvation Army drop off. Find Locations HERE.
 LDS Humanitarian Services
LDS Humanitarian Services distribute needed items to natural disaster victims, though distributed items are stocked up well in advance. If you’d like to contribute for future natural disaster needs check the “Current Needs” list HERE. In Arizona, California, Idaho, Nevada, Oregon, Utah, and Washington you can drop off donations at a local Deseret Industries store: Find Locations HERE.
 Ask Your Church
Churches are wonderful resources to those in need, including being aware of the charitable events in the community. Ask your local church (any church, even if you aren’t religious) if they are collecting donations for natural disaster victims since churches tend to be the forefront of charitable causes. If you aren’t comfortable donating directly to a church, feel free to simply ask if they know of local food banks that would accept your donation.
 Check Your Newspaper
Newspapers across the country are announcing local events for collecting donations for tornado victims. Don’t throw out that Sunday paper that came with your coupons, take a look for donations opportunities in your area.
 Where to Donate – In the South
Newspaper and volunteer websites are spreading the word about where to donate in the south.
 Alabama Donation Drop-Off Locations
(Please see links for more information)
Tuscaloosa News
Toomer’s for Tuscaloosa
Blog – Alabama
Magic City Post
Red Cross – Marion County
Work Volunteer Abroad
Five Points Baptist
 Mississippi Donation Drop-Off Locations
C Dispatch

North Carolina Donation Drop-Off Locations
ABC News 11
Food Bank of Central & Eastern North Carolina
Inter-Faith Food Shuttle

——
If you have information on local natural disaster relief donation drives please post it HERE and let’s make sure everyone has “A Full Cup!”

5 Ways to Lose Stubborn Belly Fat

Guest Post By Andrea Metcalf,
Author of Naked Fitness: The Proven 28 Day Lifestyle Program for a Slimmer, Fitter, Pain Free Body

The Naked Fitness exercises emphasize a balance between strength and flexibility, endurance, and the development of self--awareness. And you absolutely will get results and be thrilled by the benefits described below.

Move it to lose -- You have to get that blood circulating in order to burn calories and utilize fat for fuel. Walking is a great way to get into shape and the American Heart Association's recommended way to START exercising. Make every effort count by using a core balancing shoe like the Skechers Shape Ups. To really lose those inches fast try for 2 hours of walking a day. Break it up into 10 minute increments.

Eat this not That -- You have to make choices and most of the time you probably know which ones are the right or healthier way to go. To get those pounds on the scale to fall off your body try a no label diet. Eat only foods that do not require a label to tell you the nutrition or ingredients. That's fruits, veggies, meats and water. Skip the rest for two weeks and you can lose up to 10 pounds as many of my clients have.

Tea Totaling -- That's right to really whittle that waistline, you need to give up alcoholic beverages. Before you start to whine, realize that if you have a goal in mind to lose a few inches in a few weeks, then you are going to have to skip those empty calories. Opt for club soda with a slice of fruit.

Hydratation sensation -- Water is key to keeping your muscles working optimally and your metabolic one too. So drink water as your beverage of choice even over diet sodas. You'll reduce the amount of chemicals that you are putting into your body that may be holding onto to that waistline.

Muffin movers -- Strength training is key to building calorie burning muscles, so try these great strength moves to tone, not bulk up, your total body. Try on a pair of Shape Up Resistance trainers to get a little more out of this workout.

© 2010 Andrea Metcalf, author of Naked Fitness: The Proven 28 Day Weight Loss Program for a Slimmer, Fitter, Pain Free Body

Time for the homeschooling mommy and daddy

Suddenly Homeschooling: A Quick-Start 
Guide to Legally Homeschool in 2 Weeks

Guest Post by Dr. Marie-Claire Moreau
Few people in the world are as busy as homeschooling parents. Between schooling and lesson plans, outside lessons and activities, scheduling and record-keeping, not to mention staying up-to-date with teaching materials and homeschooling methodologies, the days sometimes never seem to end. Add to this larger-than-average families spending longer-than-usual amounts of time at home and it is easy to see why homeschooling parents face constant activity and virtually no down-time – pretty much ever.

While it’s par for the course (and most families wouldn’t have it any other way) homeschooling schedules leave little precious time for moms and dads to spend together. As the first several years of homeschooling blur by, and the next several years are met with greater challenges as children grow and work levels deepen, best laid plans to make time for mom and dad are often pushed aside.

It isn’t that homeschooling parents don’t want time together, it’s just that it never seems, well… possible. Not without giving up something important for the kids, that is.

And therein is the problem.

Though the duties and responsibilities of homeschooling parents are serious and their importance cannot be overstated, putting attention on the marriage is important, too. Placing a greater emphasis on homeschooling and less on the marriage may begin to cause strain, resentment, and in some cases even be quite disastrous over time.

So how can busy homeschooling parents carve out time for themselves when there seems to be little time for a shower or a hot meal, let alone a night out?

The solution is one of changing priorities. And while it may seem counter-productive at first, it is actually quite the opposite. Just canceling one class or postponing a single play-date can easily clear an afternoon or evening calendar. Ask family or friends to watch the kids, and suddenly an uninterrupted 2-3 hour time block becomes a reality. In the long run, the occasional missed activity has little bearing on ultimate homeschooling success for the children. On the other hand, it can go a long way toward maintaining the health of a marriage, which ultimately trickles back down into the family and the children anyway.

Even smaller chunks of time alone with a spouse will do. A simple cup of coffee shared during a 15-minute break or an after-dinner stroll around the yard once the children are tucked in are better than nothing at all. Once parents begin to get in to the mindset of finding extra time for one another, it becomes easier to spot opportunities like these. Plus, because time is so limited, both parties will begin to plan time together more creatively and enjoy those moments even more.
Somewhere down the road, when the children are grown and formal homeschooling has finally ended, moms and dads will be glad they invested this meaningful time with one another. The constant nurturing of the relationship during the busiest years will guarantee many future years of happiness once mom and dad finally have time off for themselves! 

Marie-Claire Moreau, Ed.D.

Author, homeschooler, teacher, mom

Suddenly Homeschooling (Wyatt-MacKenzie, 2011)

www.quickstarthomeschool.com

Curb Your Enthusiasm is my Favorite Show!!

Curb Your Enthusiasm is my Favorite Show!!

Content by Levi Mcpherson

I can't wait till April to see what Larry David has planned for the latest season of Curb Your Enthusiasm. Each season of this HBO comedy has an arc that ties together every hysterical episode. One season Larry was preparing for a Broadway show while in another the story line had him believing he was adopted and searching for his birth parents. All of the most recent season featured the buildup to a Seinfeld reunion which Larry staged purely as a way to win back his estranged wife.

If you have never seen Curb Your Enthusiasm I definitely recommend you search it out. Larry David was one of the creators of the Seinfeld show and in this comedy he plays himself, though I would have to hope it is a highly exaggerated! version on him. His character is a disagreeable curmudgeon that must constantly deal with the everyday problems that haunt all of us but somehow send him into fits of anger or embarrassing consequences. He is surrounded by a wonderful cast of family and friends.

I love that this show is on HBO which allows me to see it often through the on demand feature on my satellite service from www.TVByDirect.com. This way I never miss it and can watch it repeatedly at my leisure.

Guest Post from Author Roxanne St. Claire

First of all, I have to say that I love the concept of this site, and have been a regular visitor since I first discovered takingtimeformommy.  Even when I can’t take “me time,” there are so many great ideas and incentives here that I gather up and save for that day when I do have that valuable commodity.  So, I’m honored to be able to be part of this great community.

When a mom works from home, as I have since the day my son was born eighteen years ago, there is a (mis)conception that she doesn’t really work, and that downtime is part of her life.  I’m sure there are plenty of you out there who work from home and know that is a myth!  There is no downtime with an office across the hall from the den.  You’re in one or the other, always!

Luckily for me, “reading” is part of work and when I find a great book that is an escape, I take that journey as often as I can.  Even if all I have is twenty minutes before I crash, a book that takes me away from every concern in the world is my favorite choice.  That’s probably why I read and write romantic suspense…because the rollercoaster ride of these stories promises breathtaking adventure and heartbreaking passion and, for me, that is truly the great escape.

Yes, we have our book clubs and literary novels, our Oprah picks and self-improvement books, biographies, memoirs, and plenty of phenomenal stories that make us think hard about complex subjects.  But when I want to take that great escape, I read suspense and romance. 

So it should be no surprise that I write the “beach book” or “light read” – stories about two people who take a journey that is as dangerous to their hearts as it is to their lives.  I want my readers to forget the world when they travel to an exotic country. I want them to forget their daily lives when they fall in love with a protective, sexy bodyguard. I want them to forget to make dinner when they are in the shoes of a woman on the run.  And when I get emails from readers who tell me I’ve stolen their sleep, I say I’m sorry…but I’m not!

This month, I’m celebrating the back to back releases of two such books and I promise a great escape with both of them.  SHIVER OF FEAR takes readers on a sweeping adventure to Ireland when heroine Devyn Sterling searches for the truth about her birth mother and finds far more than she ever expected…including love from the man sent to stop her.  A month later, FACE OF DANGER slips behind the scenes of a movie star’s life when private investigator Vivi Angelino takes the job as a Oscar winning actress’s body double to lure and trap a serial killer, but discovers there is much more to her role than she’d ever anticipated…including a certain by-the-book FBI agent who has his own approach to solving crimes.  I defy you to worry about the burdens of every day life when you are escaping into these two fun fantasies!

So, tell me, busy moms…what do you like to read when your goal is to forget the world and have an adventure? 

5 Ways to Create Family Tradition and 5 Reasons Why We Should

Guest Post By Abigail Brenner, M.D.

Co-Author of The Essential Guide to Baby's First Year

Life today is so fast-paced and demanding, it’s important that we find ways to reconnect with each other on a daily basis. Establishing family traditions helps us do just that. Traditions are those special times that bring families together, allowing us to express unity as a family and to create bonds that last a lifetime. Since every family unit is unique unto itself, the traditions created by each family are sure to be unique and special to the whole family unit as well as to each of its members individually.

Focus traditions around daily activities
You can utilize every day rituals, the activities and routine of daily living, to establish family traditions. These might include rituals surrounding bedtime. Talking, reading, snuggling up together, and saying a prayer are things to look forward to on a regular basis.

Spending time alone with each child, such as having dinner with individual children or doing a hobby or project together personalizes experiences and affords parents the opportunity to recognize and encourage each child’s special qualities. Weekly family meetings (perhaps with a favorite dinner) allows for discussion of upcoming schedules and activities for each family member and provides a forum to air differences, raise important issues, and plan ahead for the family.

Create a yearly family tradition
These outings can include camping, hiking, or going fishing at the first sign of spring. The first ballgame of the season is often an event anticipated weeks ahead of time. A picnic to a favorite place or a backyard BBQ for friends and neighbors can create an atmosphere of cooperation in the planning and preparation for the event.

The entire family can participate in a “spring cleaning” day around the house, or perhaps a day annually or monthly to lend a hand within the community.

Take an annual family vacation
Family trips can include traveling to reunions to visit with extended family. An annual vacation may be purely for rest, relaxation, and fun, or may have an educational bent, such as a visit to a cultural/historical site or one that reflects a specific place or event that is being studied in school.

What’s important is that each family member has an opportunity to weigh in on choosing where the family should go. Family trips can also have themes, such as ecology, learning about the environment, working on a farm or ranch, or “service trips” such as helping a community at home or abroad.

Use your family history
These traditions provide a sense of continuity and cultural identity and allow us to explore the similarities, the things that resonate within each of us individually, with our ancestors. Visiting the cemetery to the gravesites of family members is common to many cultures and affords the family a time to honor and remember those who have gone before us.

Beyond hearing stories about one’s ancestors, making a trip of “discovery” to the mother country, the home of one’s ancestors, puts families up close and personal with the land and landmarks of one’s relatives.

Family objects and artifacts, things inherited from family members (Bibles, wine cups, candlesticks, baptismal outfits, Christmas ornaments, etc.) can be incorporated into family rituals and ceremonies.

Start a holiday tradition
Birthdays, anniversaries, and other personal family events are occasions to establish any number of traditions, such as a favorite cake or meal, or visiting a place closely associated with the event.

Annual religious and national rituals and ceremonies provide unity in community, celebrating with those who share ideas and beliefs. Beyond what we have in common, though, families can learn together about other spiritual traditions by visiting local houses of worship and participating in holidays and celebrations of other traditions. This practice encourages tolerance, acceptance, and diversity.

There’s no doubt that the benefits of establishing family traditions go well beyond spending time together. These are five reasons why we should create family traditions.

1. Traditions establish and strengthen family bonds by providing a solid structure, a sense of continuity, and a feeling of belonging.
2. Family teaches values. Traditions support and communicate a family’s belief system. They instill faith and convey the family’s perspective on life experiences.
3. The immediate family serves as your witnesses through life’s transitions, sharing and committing to each other in times of joy and celebrations and lending support and comfort through crises, disappointments, and losses.
4. A healthy family unit is a vital force in the nurturing and molding of a child’s identity. Family traditions are a sound way to foster a sense of stability and security and this contributes to the emotional health, self-esteem, and self-respect of family members.
5. The family serves as the model for all interpersonal relationships. The way an individual is cared for, supported, encouraged, allowed to express and be themselves in the family, or not, enormously influences the choices and decisions an individual makes moving into the future.

Family traditions are part of the “language” of a family, a short-hand, symbolic way of relating that everyone understands. As life moves forward and people grow and change, family traditions keep us connected. For sure, they create memories for everyone to share for a lifetime, and even beyond.

Copyright © 2011 Abigail Brenner, M.D., co-author of The Essential Guide to Baby's First Year.

Author Bio

Abigail Brenner, M.D., co-author of The Essential Guide To Baby's First Year, is a board certified psychiatrist currently in private practice as well as an ordained interfaith minister who helps people design, create, and perform personally meaningful rituals. She is also author of  SHIFT: How to Deal When Life Changes, and the author of Transitions: How Women Embrace Change and Celebrate Life.

For more information please visit http://www.abigailbrenner.com and follow the author on Twitter or Facebook

STUYVESANT CORN AND POTATO CHOWDER Recipe

Guest Post By Matthew Locricchio,
Author of Teen Cuisine

Fresh picked corn cut off the cob gets royal treatment in this classic chowder. The sweet corn that grows in and around Stuyvesant, a small agricultural community nestled along the Hudson River in upstate New York, is some of the best on the planet. A good friend who worked at one of the local farm markets asked me to come up with a recipe for chowder using local corn and potatoes. Just in case you can’t get fresh picked corn, this recipe works perfectly with frozen.

SERVES 6 TO 8
8 ears fresh corn, or 4 cups frozen kernels
1 small yellow onion
5 small Yukon gold potatoes
4 slices thick-cut bacon, or 2 tablespoons
salted butter
5 cups whole milk
4 tablespoons salted butter
2 teaspoons salt
½ teaspoon freshly ground black pepper,
plus more if needed
1 to 2 jalapeño peppers
3 to 4 sprigs flat-leaf parsley, to garnish

On your mark . . .

Husk the corn and remove the silk strands.
Slice the kernels off the cob, reserving as much of the corn liquid as possible. To do this, stand the ear of corn on the stem end in a wide flat bowl or pan. Using a sharp knife, slice down in even rows to remove the kernels. Set the corn aside.
Peel and chop the onion into small chunks, and set aside.
Wash and peel the potatoes, chop into small chunks, and place in a medium-sized bowl. Cover with cold water and set aside.

Get set . . .

If you are using the bacon, place the strips in a frying pan over medium-high heat and fry for about 3 minutes on each side or until just crispy.
Remove the bacon from the pan, lay on paper towels to drain, and let cool.
Cut the strips into small pieces and set aside.
If you are not using the bacon, melt the butter over medium heat.
Add the onions to the bacon fat or melted butter and sauté for 3 to 4 minutes over medium heat until soft and translucent. Using a metal slotted spoon, transfer the onions to a heatproof bowl and set aside.
Drain the potatoes in a colander.
Combine the onions and the potatoes in a 3- to 4-quart saucepan. Add enough cold water to just cover the potatoes.
Bring the water to a boil over medium-high heat; do not cover the pan.
Reduce to low and simmer the potatoes and onions for 15 minutes or until just tender, but not falling apart, when pierced with the tip of a sharp knife.
Drain the potato and onion mixture and set aside.

Cook!

In a 6- to -8 quart saucepan, combine the milk, corn, butter, potatoes and onions, chopped bacon, salt, and pepper.
Bring to a gentle boil over medium-high heat.
Reduce the heat to simmer and cook for 10 to 12 minutes or until heated through and simmering, stirring occasionally.
While the soup cooks, slip on a pair of latex kitchen gloves. Remove the stems and cut the jalapeños in half lengthwise. Rinse under cold water. Scrape out the seeds with the tip of a teaspoon and discard. Chop into small dice and place in a small serving dish.
Rinse the gloves and remove.
Wash the parsley, shake off the excess water, and dry the sprigs by rolling them in paper towels. Coarsely chop and put in a small bowl.
Serve the chowder hot, and pass the jalapeños and parsley at the table to sprinkle on top.

The above is an excerpt from the book Teen Cuisine by Matthew Locricchio. The above excerpt is a digitally scanned reproduction of text from print. Although this excerpt has been proofread, occasional errors may appear due to the scanning process. Please refer to the finished book for accuracy.

Copyright © 2011 Matthew Locricchio, author of Teen Cuisine
Author Bio
Matthew Locricchio, author of Teen Cuisine, was born into a restaurant and catering family and has worked in the food industry most of his life. Included in his resume as a professional cook are stints at the well-known Gandy Dancer in Ann Arbor, Michigan, the West Coast Stock Exchange's private club in San Francisco, and the legendary Barbary Coast restaurant.

Matthew has taught culinary classes and given cooking demonstrations at culinary schools throughout the country as well as the American Museum of Natural History in New York City.

James Peterson, photographer for Teen Cuisine, is a renowned cookbook author and photographer, and a James Beard and International Association of Culinary Professionals award winner.

For more information please visit http://www.cookbooksandkids.com/ and follow the author on Facebook and Twitter

Is Your Child Serious? That's Healthy!

Guest Post By Leslie R. Martin, Ph.D.,

Author of The Longevity Project: Surprising Discoveries for Health and Long Life from the Landmark Eight-Decade Study

     About a week ago I attended a party. Most of the attendees were parents and the discussion quickly turned to temperaments: whose babies slept through the night; whose little girls wore pants and whose refused anything but dresses; whose kids were cheerful and full of laughter and whose were more thoughtful and solemn. The matter of cheerfulness versus seriousness fascinated these parents because they saw it as something indicative of who the child was, and what he or she would become.

    Science confirms that temperament is indeed present from the very first moments of life and can be seen in the different ways that babies react to things in their environments. Some infants startle easily while others seem nonplussed by sudden movements or loud noises; some infants are difficult to soothe once there emotions have been aroused while others are quickly mollified and return to whatever they had been doing before. Some toddlers are very cheery, with the infectious laughter of a gleeful or mischievous tot. Equally contagious is the toothy grin of a 10-year-old after telling a clever joke. Cheerful, laughing kids provide reassurance to parents that life is good for the child.

     It's not surprising, then, some parents expressed concern about their children who seemed OK but were more serious, that is, the children who laughed, smiled, and joked less than their more exuberant peers. "It makes me wonder sometimes if something's wrong with him," "I feel like maybe I should try to pry it out of her," "I encourage him to go and have fun with his friends, but he'll never be the life of the party", and "I hope I haven't done something to make her so serious and focused; I guess I haven't set a great example in this area though; I'm not much of a partier myself."

    Sure, even young children can occasionally become depressed and retreat into their rooms, sleeping too much or eating too much, fidgeting anxiously, and feeling worthless. But this is uncommon and is quite different from simply being serious, focused, and not silly. More important than any particular characteristic is the child's comfort level with the trait. If a child is on the serious side but seems content, involved with friends or clubs or sports, and well-adjusted otherwise, there's probably nothing to worry about. In fact, we found that such children may be exceptionally healthy.

   In The Longevity Project we studied more than 1,500 children as they grew up and passed through their adolescence, adulthoods, and into old age. Being more serious as a child was not a risk factor for earlier mortality -- in fact the reverse was actually true! The very cheerful, optimistic, and humorous kids had shorter life spans, on average, than their more sober counterparts -- in part because they later took poorer care of their health and tended to smoke and drink more, among other things.

   So, except in cases where additional warning signs are present, parents of serious children can relax. Not everyone is a Charlie Chaplin or an Adam Sandler and really, think about it -- shouldn't we all be thankful for this?! Some people are simply more high-spirited than others and these differences start early. Scoring a little lower on the humor-meter is not a bad thing; and our surprising research shows that it may actually be good for one's health. Parenting is tough, and there are lots of things to worry about, but this isn't one of them.

© 2011 Leslie R. Martin, Ph.D., author of The Longevity Project: Surprising Discoveries for Health and Long Life from the Landmark Eight-Decade Study

Author Bios
Howard S. Friedman, Ph.D., author of The Longevity Project: Surprising Discoveries for Health and Long Life from the Landmark Eight-Decade Study, graduated from Yale and was awarded the National Science Foundation graduate fellowship for his doctoral work at Harvard.  He is currently Distinguished Professor of Psychology at the University of California, Riverside, and has been honored with major awards by the American Psychological Association and the Association for Psychological Science. Dr. Friedman has edited and written a dozen books and 150 scientific articles and has been named a "most-cited psychologist" by the Institute of Scientific Information.  His health and longevity research has been featured in publications worldwide.  He lives near San Diego, California

Leslie R. Martin, Ph.D., co-author of The Longevity Project: Surprising Discoveries for Health and Long Life from the Landmark Eight-Decade Study, graduated summa cum laude from California State University, San Bernadino, and received her Ph.D. from the University of California, Riverside.  Currently, she is a professor of psychology at La Sierra University, where she received the Distinguished Researcher Award and the Anderson Award for Excellence in Teaching.  Dr. Martin is also a research psychologist at the University of California, Riverside, and a key associate in Professor Friedman's longevity studies.An avid traveler, Dr. Martin climbed Mt. Kilimanjaro in 2005, and recently completed the 151-mile Marathon des Sables across the Moroccan Sahara.  She lives in Riverside, California.

For more information please visit http://www.howardsfriedman.com/longevityproject/ and follow the authors on Facebook and Twitter